Saturday, March 11, 2017

Dance

"What do you want?"
"Does it make sense if I tell you, I'll know it once I find it."
"Is this a sort of looking for a missing piece?"
"Initially I thought that is how it supposes to work, to find a person who can complete me. But if you taking that type of analogy, it means you build your assumption on a static relation. You have a list of criteria on what you want from a partner and vice versa. Compatibility is being valued based on a checklist on how the criteria match. But a relation is something dynamic, you try to make it works. It is more like a dance rather a piece of puzzle. In dancing, both you and your partner try to adjust each other's strengths and weaknesses to create a beautiful choreography, whereas in a puzzle, you kind of start from the end since you already know the type of picture you want to achieve."
"So for you the most important thing is commitment since everything else is a process?"
"Unfortunately no. Similar with a dance partner, some persons are just not meant to be. There is no scientific explanation for this, but since this about heart, you have to follow what your heart told you."
"You don't believe in a list. Are you suggesting dating? How do you know then?"
"I do not think dating is the answer. For me dating is like a Zeno's Paradox, each time you think you know the person better, the more you find out some new things about the person. The process is indefinite. The other thing about dating is that it involves feelings, which once it ends, is devastating."
"So how do you know?"
"By talking face to face for hours and looking the other person straight to the eyes. I need to know whether I can trust the person or not."

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